I’ve seen it hundreds of times. I did it myself. I got into recovery because of my wife’s discovery. But it wasn’t enough.
Patrick Carnes wrote, “The momentary willingness that comes after disclosure or discovery will not turn into long-term sobriety unless there is a recognition that past attempts to control don’t work. Unless there is a true surrender of control, change will not last.”
You can have recovery. Or you can be in control. But you can’t have both.
And that’s actually a good thing, because being in control is overrated. Surrender to Jesus is underrated. He said it himself: “Whoever loses his life for my sake will find it” (Matthew 16:25).
Here’s my suggestion. Do Step 3 – “Make a decision to turn your life and will over to the care of God as you understand God.”
Recovery Step: Let go of control. It’s the only way to get from where you are to where you want to be.